[Fanfic] Tower of God - Collection for KhunBaam week 2022: Day 3

Este ya creo que será el último que pueda subir al día de este challenge :c Como dije en la publicación anterior, volví al trabajo y está mega bélico porque estoy sola en mi área desde hace un tiempo ya u.u Bue, ya veremos. Ojalá pueda hacer uno más aunque sea, aunque el siguiente sí tendrá diálogo (creo), no como estos, que por ser solo reflexiones o algo así son más fáciles de escribir. Y pos este es puro angst de Hidden Floor Viole, btw. Está basado en otro fic un poco más largo que quiero escribir (tendrá 2 o 3 caps), titulado "Play pretend". Ojalá pueda escribirlo en un futuro no tan lejano XD Perdóname, bebé Viole, me gusta mucho hacer sufrir a los personajes que adoro XD

*****

Collection for KhunBaam week 2022
by RPMizu
 
Day 3: Secrets / Mirror

This is a secret between a man who is desperately in love, and a creature born from loneliness.

At least that is what Mr. Khun said when they began with all of this. That it had to stay a secret. “No one can know, especially not Baam.”, Khun whispered that night, a glint of madness in his eyes, clearly visible even in the dark.

Since Viole did not know anything about intimacy, he did not understand a thing when Khun proposed they should satiate each other’s needs. Khun would be able to let loose his desires for Baam, those he kept locked deep within. And Viole would get the company and affection he longed so much for.

But Viole is just a copy, a mirror of the original Baam. He was made by this floor solely with the purpose of killing his original self. He was not made to have relationships with anyone, let alone Baam’s best friend. Just a fake existence, trapped in a virtual world. And still, he could not say no when Khun offered such tempting agreement.

Just as the original Baam, Viole was completely ignorant about sex. Still, and again just like the original, Viole knew he loves Khun as much as his simulated heart allows him to. Therefore, he did not protest at all when Khun assaulted his mouth, marked his skin with nails and teeth, and claimed Viole for his own for the first time.

That time was particularly hard on him. His body melted in pleasure, yes, but it also seemed to have been split in half. After all, Khun would not spare any delicacy with a fake like him. All of his tenderness would be reserved only for the original. For a moment, those blue eyes were filled with heat and mad desire. But it would take only a second for them to turn cold as ice, piercing through him mercilessly.

Viole thought that, with each passing day, everything would be better, easier. And in a way, he was right. At least it was easier on his body, as he grew more used to Khun’s rough yet pleasurable treatment with every secret encounter. But was it easier on his heart? His simulated heart that loved Khun as much as the original’s. The answer was a robust… maybe? With each second they spent together, Viole found himself longing more and more for Khun’s affection, even though he knew perfectly well that that love did not belong to him. It was for the real Baam, and he is just a mirror, an illusory image that only served one purpose: for Khun to use him to vent his frustrations on.

And so what Viole waited for never arrived. He could not find the adoration he remembered being in Khun’s eyes every time he looked at the original. But since his memories were simply copied from the original, they did not feel as he was truly the one being gazed in that way. Jealous. He was infinitely jealous of the original. The one that had everything Viole wanted. The one who was not utterly alone. The one who had his own purpose, not something that a machine dictated for him. The one who had Khun wrapped around his finger.

Being a creature born as a mirror of Baam’s darkest stage in his life, he thought the only thing he knew was lonesomeness and neglect.

Driven by those feelings of envy, and after many nights of secret encounters with Khun, Viole suggests he could spill the secret the next time he goes to confront the original. He could not even finish the sentence, when Khun’s cold hands were already squeezing his neck. As his lungs became devoid of air and he felt a little light-headed, the look in Khun’s eyes became imprinted in Viole’s brain. Coldness, insanity and dread. It made Viole understand that, in Khun’s head, his relationship with Baam would be destroyed if his beloved knew how Khun used a copy of him as a sex toy. The pressure around his neck stopped just before Viole started losing consciousness.

So, should Viole expose their little dirty secret? He thought about it for a long time, but in the end, the conclusion was a simple and confident no. Yes, it is painful, everything about this situation hurts him badly, but whatever, he is used to the pain. He is the part of Baam that suffered daily after all, both physically and psychologically. But that part of his life was not only the loneliest, but also the one in which he was more desperate to keep his loved ones safe from harm. And most of all, he loves Khun. He will try to defeat the original, even if, just like Baam, he does not want to fight anyone. He has to, because that is what the program that brought him to life dictates. However, he will not expose Khun’s feelings, his mistakes. That is for him to confess to the original, when time is due. When he feels that it will not ruin their friendship. Someday he will notice Baam loves him as much as Khun loves him. How would Viole not know, if he feels the same way?

Someday, Baam will really have everything Viole dreamt of. If he could not have it, at least a part of him will be happy one day. Surely.

And Viole? He is meant to disappear into nothingness. When Baam decides to step away from the mirror that brought him to life, Viole’s image will fade. He can only pray for it to be quick and painless. That way, everything would come to an end. He would not have to suffer anymore. Because what meaning holds an existence as his own? And Khun will forget all about him in an instant, as he will not need him anymore. He seems to hate Viole, after all, or hate that he is a remainder of the time when they were apart, when he could not keep Baam safe and he had to go through everything alone.

Not that it is Viole’s fault, but what a copy feels is not important, of course.

And days later, when his battle with the original comes to a close and he starts getting absorbed by him, he closes his eyes and a lone tear slips across his cheek.

Please make him happy, Baam. I know you want to.

Goodbye, Mr. Khun.

-END of Day 3-